Wigan preview: heed the words of Macaulay Caulkin

Posted on by
Reply

So here we are folks. After a season of slogging towards the finish-line – an adjective that I feel is certainly fitting for our season – we find ourselves with five days to win two games and stake our claim to continue to eat at European Football’s top table.

As Macaulay Caulkin said famously in Home Alone: “This is it; don’t get scared now”.

Tonight it’s Wigan at The Emirates with, I think it’s fair to say, a lot riding on the game for both teams. I watched a bit of the Championship Play-Off semi final between Brighton and Palace yesterday, to which the annually trotted out line of “the most expensive match in world football” is often used, but I wonder how much tonight’s game is worth to both teams – just putting that into terms that Stan Kroenke and the Arsenal board might understand.

An Arsenal victory will condemn Wigan to a life away from the trimmings of the Premier League (albeit with ‘Parachute Payments’) for next season, whilst a Wigan win will all but end our hopes of a Champions League qualification slot for next year. And with it the possibility of added investment to the playing team (or at least a reduction in what could have been budgeted for) I don’t think I’m being too overly dramatic when I say that – there is no way Sunderland will do us any favours at the weekend against the Spuds – you can be sure of that. A draw does nothing for either side. It means a win on the last day for Wigan needs to be by about 12 goals and Arsenal have to beat Newcastle whilst waiting to hear from news from White Hart Lane.

Yesterday I spoke of how much more nervous I seem to be this season compared to seasons past – well, that tension and stress has now hit fever pitch, such is the worry that the team fluffs their lines tonight. We have looked shaky at times during this winning streak we’re on, and if we show any sign of psychological ‘handbraking’ as Arsene might put it, then you can be sure own opponents will capitalise.

For Wigan the threat to us is all to clear: Kone, Maloney, McManaman and the ball winning abilities of James McCarthy. They are the offensive threats and will attempt to catch Arsenal on the counter. Martinez is not stupid and he knows he won’t control possession for the whole match, so he’ll most likely set up with three at the back, look to catch Arsenal on the break with his wing backs and snatch a goal or two. That’s how Wigan beat us last season and that will be their game plan tonight. The decisions Martinez will need to make is how much rotation he can legitimately hand to his players. They have played three games in eight days where Arsenal have played none. If he is going to concede possession then he’s going to need his fittest players to be running their guts out tonight. He’ll also want a quick start. Last season they got two first half goals that stunned us and they managed to hold on through some shocking offensive play by Arsenal and some heroic defending. Martinez will know that his team will tire in the last 30 minutes or so, so his game plan will be to hope he is at least a goal up at half time.

As for us, well, I’ve got no idea how Le Boss will line up his side. He admitted yesterday that Jack is currently on painkillers and will undergo an operation on his ankle in the summer, so I’d be surprised if he’s anything but on the bench tonight. That means I suspect we will either see Cazorla dropping into midfield with either Gervhino or Podolski on the left, or the diminutive Spaniard will move across to the left to accommodate a starting slot for Tomas Rosicky. My personal preference would be to have Cazorla in the middle with Arteta and Ramsey, with Podolski up top and Gervhino on the left, and The Ox on the right. I know Theo has stepped up in his last two games and scored both of our goals, but at home against a team that will probably sit deep (especially if they are a goal up) his threat is nullified and so we need tricky players that can beat their man. Gervhino beats himself half the time, but the other half he can beat his man, so we might get more joy from him starting.

Whoever does get the nod from the manager needs to be up from this from the off. We steamrolled Manchester United for the first half a couple of weeks ago and our high pressing, intensity and desire got us up quickly and only a defensive mistake on Sagna’s part stopped us from winning the game. We need that same level of intensity from the first minute tonight. If we pour cold water on Wigan’s hopes early in the first half, they will tire enough for us to finish them off in the second, so we have to start quickly.

I think my nervousness about tonight stems from what happened to us at home against Wigan last year. We went into the game in form and a win would have all but secured Champions League football, yet we got our noses bloodied. I was confident before that game last year and was dealt a real reality check. Wigan had, and have now, the tools to damage us and we can’t – nay, mustn’t – let them do it again. There is more riding on this game for us than there was last season, just like their is more riding on it for them, so the pressure is on both clubs.

It’s never easy supporting Arsenal, it requires the constitution of a professional chilli eater, and it is going to be tested tonight. Let’s hope The Arsenal players can pass with flying colours.

See you on the other side my friends.

Hating what other teams have made me become

Posted on by
Reply

So as the weekend has drawn to its full closure, we are left with a sense of disappointment from some of the results of our rivals that didn’t quite go to plan. That both of the results have an element of mirroring one another – silly red card eventually leading to a late victory for both Chelski and the Spuds – adds to a sickening feeling I have been feeling in my stomach over the weekend. It may have been some of the San Miguel I drank on Saturday night, but I suspect some of it is also nervousness of the footballing gods looking to conspire against us.

Even those results which were supposed to be irrelevant to us have knock-on effects. The victory of Wigan over Moneychester City may have been great to see at the time, but now the questions arise as to whether Wigan needed any more confidence and motivation boosting ahead of our crucial game on Tuesday night. After seeing the results at the weekend also go against the pie-munchers, they now know that nothing less than two wins out of two will keep them in our division. Sunderland, Norwich and Newcastle’s point accumulation means only to fan the flames of desire for Roberto Martinez’s boys.

It’s why playing already safe teams like Stoke was always going to be easier for the Spuds, despite the stupidity of Charlie Adam. If we can take anything from yesterday’s game, I guess it’s that we now have even more reason to despise those primates from the Potteries and their tracksuit wearing PG Tips chimp of a manager. You’d think that celebrating 150 years of existence would warrant a performance of heroic proportions, but I guess a team of trained orcs know not of that sort of desire.

If we also want to hold out some sort of hope, it’s that Alan Pardew seems to have already told his players to relax after their victory at QPR, saying he doesn’t care if they lose 4-0 to us on the last day as long as the fans enjoy themselves. That’s the spirit Alan, now if your French lads can just part like the Red Sea in just under a weeks time, that would be grand lad. Before that though, we’ll have to make sure we’ve got something to fight for. I don’t think a draw will be enough tomorrow.

Look at what this season has done to me. In a footballing sense, I hate what I have become this season, and I hate that the results of other teams mean so much. That I’ve had to cheer on Chelski and Stoke, as well as United, is a horrible thing to have to do. Real ‘wash your mouth out with soap’ type stuff. I didn’t feel like this last season and I haven’t ever been so concerned with other teams results in my entire life. I’ve always thought that providing we do our job then the rest doesn’t matter. And that truth still remains right now. So why am I so nervous? Why are the butterflies returning to me on a Monday morning just typing this? Because we know what could happen. We saw it last season when a Wigan side turned up to an in-form Arsenal and snatched three points from us. At that time we were playing good football. Whilst the form for us is similar again this time of the year, we haven’t exactly been cutting through teams like a motorcyclist in an M25 ten mile tailback, have we?

It’s a bit farcical that we’re playing one of – at the moment – the third worst teams in the division and we Gooners are more nervous than Chelski or United at home. We should be relishing the prospect of sending a team down knowing that our own future is secured. But much like last season, we go into the last two games with it all up in the air.

It’s not good for ones health, I can readily assure you of that.

Yet ultimately, despite the results of others, despite the nerves that are causing people to take to Twitter in outrage, and despite the extra motivation of our opponents, we must remember who we are. We are Arsenal football club. We are one of the most successful teams in British football with the most successful manager in our long and proud history. We are fighting for a top four spot because we have won a lot more games than we’ve lost and Wigan are fighting relegation because they have lost more than they’ve won. Our players need to show confidence and conviction and let their talents shine through any potential nerves. If we play to the best of our abilities tomorrow night then there can be only one winner.

So chin up Gooners, we’re all in this together.

From friend to enemy, congrats to scowling, Wigan Athletic

Posted on by
Reply

So, plucky little Wigan won themselves an FA Cup, did they? How about that. Today is clearly a day to celebrate the success of the underdog, the David (as in ‘Goliath’), the little guy, the outsider.

For me, it was pleasant to see Moneychester City felled by a team that is scrapping for its Premier League life. And it was almost reminiscent of another giant-killing that is so close to our hearts. It was only a few short years ago that we were the Goliath that was slain by Davey in the form of Birmingham. They too were fighting for their lives and were shortly relegated after they emerged victorious from Wembley in the League Cup final against us. The defeat by City yesterday seems to be similar to the defeat we suffered. City never really seemed up for it and Wigan by and large outplayed their counterparts.

So congratulations to Wigan and I hope their fans enjoy their moment in the spotlight.

But from whence happiness at their success resided, shall come aggression from Gooners over the next 48 hours. For that plucky side that lifted one of footballs oldest trophies is now our enemy. They stand between us and Champions League qualification and we must pounce on their joys and perhaps over-indulgence to shatter their dreams of staying in the Premier League.

I hope Wigan are going on a three-day bender. I hope they are all red-eyed and knackered when it comes to Tuesday night. Because the margins that are lain before us allow for no error, no deviation from the three-point-path, no allowance for slip ups.

Our team needs to be wary of a highly motivated, highly confident and highly charged up Wigan side, and needs to counter that with our own motivation and determination. More on that in the coming days methinks.

Our eyes now all turn to Mordor, where the orks reside lurking for some cocks, so lets hope they like the taste of man-flesh and can muster up something that will get us all dancing a merry jig and leave the possibility of Champions League qualification even more in our hands. Supporting Stoke will be another painful exercise in self-harming, but right now, needs must. Personally, I don’t think it’ll happen. And if it doesn’t happen, at least we can have yet another reason to hate Stoke and everything they are.

Keep those fingers crossed Gooners.

Memory Lane: Arsenal Vs Southampton 2003 FA Cup Final

Posted on by
Reply

Morning (or afternoon, or evening) Gooners, I hope you are coping with a footballess weekend so far, because lets face it, there isn’t any REAL football that goes one, not without The Arsenal. Sure, there might be some other teams that are playing in matches today, but that doesn’t interest me so much. The news about Arsenal is all very quiet and all you’ll get if you go hunting for it is a million-and-one pieces of pointless gossip that is as likely to happen as Ashley Cole and Emmanuel Adebayor announcing that from this day forward they will play for the love of the game and not take any respective money from the two clubs they plat for.

If I’ve got nothing to do then I might watch the FA Cup final, but it will mainly be to see how Wigan perform. I hope that Martinez sends them out like lions and they expend so much energy and effort today that they turn up on the Emirates playing surface on Tuesday night with wobbly knees and a wobbly defence. Mind you, if results go against them this weekend it could all be rendered quite irrelevant, with Newcastle, Norwich and Sunderland all needing just a point to secure their own safety. Of course, ideally you want Newcastle to get that (so they have nothing to play for against us), Sunderland to not (so they have something to play for against the Spuds) and Grant Holt not to consume his own body weight in cheese and roll over his fellow professionals. But there you go.

So in the absence of any real news, I thought I’d take a quick trip down memory lane and remember my first cup final – Arsenal Vs Southampton in 2003 at the Millennium Stadium. I was in my second year at Uni and I’d never got close to getting tickets to any final before, so when my Godfather phoned me whilst in my digs in Lancaster, I knew that I didn’t care that I didn’t have any money for booze for the next two weeks if I paid for my train down south, I was getting to that cup final.

I travelled down the night before to my parents home in Hertfordshire and I remember having this tingling feeling all over. I was finally going to get to see The Arsenal with the possibility of winning some silverware. Although the team had lost out to United in the title race already (to this day I still feel that we should have cleaned up – it was the season before we went unbeaten and we fell just short despite having a better team than United – no-one will ever tell me otherwise), there was such an air of confidence, quality and belief in the team that I always felt that we could win it. Of course, at the time you’re wrapped up in the nerves of it being a ‘one-off game’, but when you look at the two respective sides that played that day you know that there was only going to be one winner. We just did what Arsenal always do and made it look a lot closer than it was. And I remember right at the end we even had a few hairy moments, with David Seaman making a fabulous save to palm the ball away right at the death.

Of course, it was Bobby Pires that scored what was a scrappy goal, but nobody cared in the half of the stadium I was in. It was over ten years ago that the game was played but my memories of the day are as vivid as ever. The smell of the pitch, the roar of the fans, the hugging of random individuals I’ve never met and will never see again, that’s what cup football success does for you. And it does make me stop and think about our own current dearth of that winning feeling and wonder whether I’d trade it all in. If some sort of magical entity were to come to me and tell me that I could secure Arsenal’s place in the Champions League for the next ten years – that Arsenal would always finish in the top four from 2013 to 2023 – but in return I had to have the memories of that cup final erased from my mind, would I do it? Of course not. Because that’s why you’re a football fan. You’re in it for the highs. You want to feel that jubilation. You want to feel like you’re floating a few feet above the ground and whilst that doesn’t happen very often as we’ve all learnt (those of us that are old enough) over the last eight years, you do learn to cherish those memories and keep them close to your heart.

They say that what doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger. I think this current drought of trophies (although in the grand scheme of things it’s not the biggest drought in the world!) is going to make that next success all the sweeter. And when it comes, when we are all together drinking in the pubs around Wembley Stadium, let’s just make sure we savour it – because it will last with us forever.

Until tomorrow people.

‘Brand Arsenal’ and knocking for Arsene

Posted on by
Reply

So Fergie has (probably) named his successor and that man is a fellow Scot in the form of David Moyes. Can the football world move on now please? I mean really, is there going to be over analysis on the stools that Moyes passes between now and July 1st when he takes over at Old Trafford? Yesterday I heard on a radio phone in about whether or not Moyes’ preferred sports psychologist will be joining him at Old Trafford. Honestly. It’s getting as much publicity as a royal wedding or funeral. Is David Cameron going to announce a bank holiday of mourning at the end of June?

Funnily enough, football is still going on and there are still things to be decided, as crazy as that sounds. Although, the fact that van Persie signed and said he wanted to work under Fergie is quite amusing, I have to say. I wonder whether the little boy inside him is thrashing his arms around in a tantrum because he is not going to get what he wants next season. I guess it won’t really matter to him – he’ll still get his megabucks, he can spend the rest of his career telling the world he was justified in leaving Arsenal for a title, plus he’ll probably revert to type and spend much of next season relaxing on the treatment table anyway

In other, much more interesting news (but only slightly, because it involves Arsenal), the club announced that it will be going on a pre-season tour of Asia and will break new ground by visiting Vietnam. There’ll also be Japan and Indonesia in the offing. I have to be callous here and tell you that I couldn’t really give a monkeys where the club go in Asia if I’m honest. It’s all a money making exercise anyway and it’s not as if there’ll be much interest in taking a holiday there to watch these friendly games. These expeditions are all about ‘Brand Arsenal’ and building new commercial revenue streams. Which to be honest, whilst I say I don’t care, ultimately if it achieves the aim of building the fan base, growing revenue and enhancing Arsenal’s coffers so it can be re-invested in the first team, you’ll nee find any Gooners that disapprove of it.

I guess the real question will come down to whether the revenues will actually be re-invested. My thoughts have always been that Stan knows he’s sitting on a lovely little cash cow that he can sell off for a premium come the end of next season or the season after, but the very fact he leaves the club to be run by those folks back in Eng-land so he can enjoy his ranch in Colorado must surely give some of us hope that there’ll be substantial investment in the playing staff this summer. After all, he needs to be able to sell of a successful club and he’ll have his advisors telling him that the only way to do that will be to improve the playing staff. We’ll see soon enough I guess.

I wonder if Arsene will have a press conference today, or will leave it until Monday? And how does it work? Do the media have to phone Arsene’s wife and ask if he’s coming out to play tomorrow? I suspect we’ll probably get his thoughts on Monday. After all, every manager in the land is going to be asked their opinion of Ferguson and expected to eulogise of him for the duration of their press conference. Heaven forbid they should concentrate on their own matches that they have this weekend. So if Arsene leaves his presser until Monday, he might be able to avoid a sixty minute Fergie ‘love-in’.

Anyway, that’s enough from me today. Catch you tomorrow. Knock for me, yeah?

Feeling dirty, searching for a number 2, but I do like Nachos

Posted on by
2

Ten frigging minutes. That’s all that Chelski needed to hold out for. Ten minutes and the one time we Gooners could stomach wanting that team of complete football mercenaries, snide, low-life footballers that play in a stadium where the only way to generate atmosphere is to wave massive flags in front of the fans at the beginning and half time of each match.

I felt dirty cheering a Chelski goal. It felt wrong. Inhuman. Like some sort of act of betrayal. But needs must and our needs yesterday were to have the opportunity for Champions League football wrestled back into our own hands once more. And to be fair, a draw between the two teams means that qualification is now down to us. Two wins and we’re in. But the margins for error aren’t exactly wide. We will play two teams that are fighting for Premier League survival. Had both Wigan and Newcastle already been clear of the relegation dogfight then you’d fancy your chances, but when a team is in a state of desperation you never know what extra percentage they can put on.

That’s why I’ll be paying plenty of attention to the QPR v Newcastle game on Saturday. A draw there will ensure Newcastle are safe and, whilst I don’t doubt they will still try hard to win in front of their home fans, there should be an extra incentive for the Arsenal players playing for a Champions League spot. The ideal scenario of course is that Wigan are already relegated by the time they play us, but I’d be surprised to see that happen if I’m completely honest. Permutations, permutations, permutations – all of this thinking about stuff, watching other teams aside from Arsenal and putting my faith into lost causes like Fernando Torres is enough to send a body into convulsions.

Elsewhere in Arsenal world, Lukas Fabianski has spoken about how confident he feels now that he’s been given a run of games to prove himself, plus he’s ready to battle Wojciech for the number one jersey. It’s all rousing and great stuff to hear, but after Szczesny’s recent performances in between the sticks, I’d be quite surprised to see Le Boss opt for the elder of the two Pole’s. there’s only two games of the season left and, unless we’re in a position where the final game of the season is irrelevant (highly unlikely given that the Spuds will most likely pick up points against both Stoke and at home to Sunderland – there goes those permutations again!), I don’t think we’ll see Fabianski in an Arsenal shirt again if I’m completely honest. His contract is up at the end of the season, he’s had a number of years where he’s failed to properly establish himself and I think Le Boss might go for an experienced ‘keeper to rival/mentor Szczesny for that place in the team. And I think that would be the right thing for Arsenal. Think back to the games that Fabianski has played during his spell. Did he make great saves? No. Did he command his area? A little bit. Was he steady? Yes. But he often had little to do. My personal opinion is that the reality is that he will never fully make that number one jersey his own, so we need to ensure we get another ‘keeper that can at least keep Szczesny on his toes and continuing to perform.

The Nacho man has spoken to the official site about his time playing for Osasuna and then Malaga before joining Arsenal. It’s an interesting read and gives you an idea how quickly and sometimes surreally things happen in football. Here we have a local player playing for his local team as a steady and secure left back, then two years later he’s been through two clubs, is starting to establish himself in the Spanish national team and is looking like a world-class left back. I’ve been quite surprised how quickly he’s slotted in to the first team, I have to say. He’s adapted to the physical side of the Premier League almost immediately – on his debut I saw him bloody up Jon Walters – and is looking like a solid and assured player. With the number of games that players play in top-flight English football it is impossible to go through the season with just one major player in a position and so whilst we were all a bit baffled at the time of the signing, there aren’t many Gooners too dissatisfied with Monreal’s performances to date.

I guess it’s reflective of the improved defensive performances that I look at Arsene’s options in defence and feel like actually, at this moment in time, it’s one of the parts of the team that doesn’t need a bit of strengthening to it. That we have both Sagna and Jenkinson, Gibbs and Monreal, Plus Mertesacker, Koscienly and Vermaelen all fighting for places has really added more competition and more concentration to the team. Everyone is on their toes. It’s great to see.

Right, that’s just about yer lot from me today. But I think I’ll leave you with something to ponder. Olivier Giroud has left us frustrated at times this season, yet he’s still scored goals, got assists and has had to ‘bed in’ to coping with the Premier League. Last night I watched a Fernando Torres that has been in the country many years, cannot hold the ball up, doesn’t seem to be able to take on his man, plus you could get four Olivier Giroud’s for what Chelski paid for him. You’d still have change for a few Aston Martin’s an a detached house in Virginia Water, Surrey.

External factors irrelevant, Arsenal must do their job, Theo too

Posted on by
Reply

Last night I decided, against my better judgement, to watch Wigan versus Swansea. My main motive for doing such a thing was to see what this Wigan side have about them and what we could expect at The Emirates in just under a weeks time.

Wigan were up against the Welsh Charlton. Secured of safety long ago and with the League Cup tucked safely in their trophy cabinet, they haven’t really been playing with any kind of momentum or form so I expected Wigan to win.

But Wigan were positively dire defensively. The third goal they conceded could have been recorded, greyscaled into black and white and re-marketed as a Laurel and Hardy sketch.

Of course, that means that footballing anomalies like Gary Caldwell will suddenly decide to roar like Spartans at the Emirates next weekend, spurned on by Mike Dean who is now some form of anti-Christ figure to Arsenal fans.

I have to say I’m surprised to be constantly reading completely non-related Arsenal factors being jumped upon and moaned about on my Twitter feed. We had people already writing us off on Sunday because Chelski beat a United team that couldn’t care less, people taking to their timelines to cry foul about the appointment of Mike ‘Arsenal haven’t won in 20 games’ Dean and we had people analysing what the best permutation for Arsenal would be in relation to last nights results. I am genuinely concerned for some people’s health tonight I have to tell you. On the basis of some of the fan hyperbole that is being thrown around like a sack of potatoes so far there will probably be some suicide pacts drawn up if the Chelski v Spuds game doesn’t bring the right result.

The reality of our current situation is that the players, the manager and everyone else at Arsenal football club can do nothing about external factors, and I don’t think they are looking so intimately at whether or not Mike Dean will be giving Wigan all the freedom of North London next week. Yes, he’s a plebeian and his refereeing decisions over the years have cost us, but if our players come out to the turf on Tuesday night and are up for it, there is nothing Dean could possibly do to stop us from scoring. He’s not going to disallow a flurry of goals for no reason.

Let’s also look at who we are playing. As it stands, our next two games are against the teams third and fourth from bottom. If you are looking at finishing in the top four and thus getting a Champions League qualification place for next year, you really should have the players capable of picking up six points. And if we do that then we’ll finish on 73 points, which is three better than last season and shows how much more competitive this season has been.

Our current potential for an improvement points-wise this season has been aided by a sharing in collective goalscoring and, with Theo Walcott now hitting his 20 goal target he set himself this season, he’s spoken to the official site about how the teams collective objective of Champions League football is more important than his own tally. Of course he’s right, but I think the goals that he has shown this season has helped to really push him up the scale in terms of his importance to the team this season. He’s quite an enigma of a player is our Theo. he can go a couple of games looking like the most bang average £100k per week attacker, then hit purple patches that see him get vital goals, which leaves fans like you or I frustrated that he hasn’t added even more to his tally this season.

There’s no doubt he’s a talented finisher. And he scores goals against the better opponents – the week before lasts goal against United being testimony to that – but he does sometimes seem to get even the most obvious things wrong. At the weekend he did that thing where he has a bit of grass in front of him, opens his stride, but forgets to take the ball with it and ends up having to check himself. That’s the sort of ‘d’oh!’ moment that, could he eradicate from his game, we could be looking at a 30 goal a season striker.

The debate will continue to go on as to whether he could ever be a central striker, but as far as I’m concerned as long as he’s banging them in to the tune of a minimum of 20 a season for the next few years, we should just ensure that he gets on to the field as much as possible. Lets also remember that he’s still 24. He can still get better and can still score more goals. Perhaps he’ll never fully eradicate the errors in his game, but as long as he remains prolific over the duration of a season, you won’t find people like me complaining.

He’s still got time to bag a few more though, so lets hope he does over the next couple of games. Anyway, that’ll do for me for today. Catch ya on tha flip side. Or something like that.